When real things happen to imaginary people

 Sunday I played V:tM, then went home with a migraine only slightly worse than the one that sent me to Urgent Care a few years ago. Monday's migraine was milder, but still meant I couldn't do anything other than flop on the couch, get a lot of electrolytes into my system, and stare blankly at the TV. Oh, and ask the FB hivemind if any of the other migraine peeps had taken Topamax, and what their experiences were.

While some folks said it worked great for them, and the worrying side effects passed after a few weeks, pretty much everyone else said "OH G-D NO IT WAS HORRIBLE", mostly related to hellacious brain fog/word loss/short-term memory loss to the point of not remembering a lot that went on while they were taking the med. As I've already got brain fog and word loss issues thanks to my chronic illnesses, I don't want to even take a chance about doubling down. So if (well, when) I get hit with a migraine that bad again, it's just going to be Benadryl, electrolytes, and possibly praying for a very short-term coma. 

But today is better! Today is so much better! I may be able to Get Things Done!

(An aside: I want to start using bandom lyrics for post titles again, but I couldn't think of a good one to use for this. Hmmph. How dare Gerard Way and Pete Wentz betray me?)

The Botox I've been getting for the hellacious muscle spasm migraines has been working like a charm, ohthankG-D. But I still get sinus migraines (or what seem like sinus migraines), and the frequency has been increasing. So I finally went to an ear/nose/throat specialist.

He didn't see anything out of the ordinary, and the CT scan I had in 2016 seemed fine. He strongly recommended I get tested for allergies, and make an appointment with a neurologist.

The good news: I'm not allergic to anything! Dust mites, native plants and grasses, cats; none of it!

The bad news: why the hell do I suffer sinus migraines at least once a week, sometimes more?

The frustrating news: none of my friends and family agree with me that trepanation would help. Just let me poke a tiny hole in my head! It would release the pressure! (Note: I am not seriously contemplating trepanation.)

Anyway, the appt. with the neurologist is tomorrow. Let's see if they can figure anything out.

STILL! HEADACHE! FREE!

Since Thursday! This is a damn miracle, that's what it is.

And today we ordered me a motorized standing desk, because the (antique by now, it belonged to my grandparents) dining table I've been using as a workstation for my laptop and two monitors for the past three years was never a good idea. I'd never found an office chair that was tall enough to be comfortable at that table, and that doesn't take into account that any one that was even close enough to use at that table meant my feet didn't touch the ground.

So! Standing desk, arriving this week. It's a good thing I finished The Great Decluttering: The Workdesk over the weekend. (Well, almost finished. I still have to haul some boxes of things out from underneath the table, but that should be relatively easy. Plus the Stroppy One is going to help me.)

Aaaaaand I've finally FINALLY accepted that I need to carry smaller/lighter purses with less stuff in them. Yes, I've said this before (every couple of years, I think?), but it has been made very clear to me that I absolutely have to do this and stick with it. I'm currently making a shoulder strap for a vintage velvet handbag I have, which should be just large enough for me to carry the essentials:

• Phone.


• Wallet.


• Powder compact and two tubes of lipstick.


• Tiny pill case of anti-anxiety meds.


• Keys.


• Sunglasses.


• Tiny notebook.


• Pen.


• Handkerchief.

And maybe, just maybe, my mini multi-tool and tiny sewing kit. What? I actually end up needing those two things fairly often.

NO HEADACHE. I don't think that will stop being astonishing to me any time soon.

Today I had a long-overdue dentist appointment, mostly for a cleaning and checkup. It was overdue because I've been busy and incapable of scheduling things, not because of any apprehension. I LOVE my dentist. As in, I have gone out for drinks with him and his hubby, because I adore him so. He's charming, sarcastic, and incredibly good at what he does.

After the checkup part was done, he asked me a bunch of questions about my (usual type of) migraines, then did some pressure tests on my jaw, temples, and the base of my skull. After I winced away from all of them, he said, "So yeah, your migraines? Probably tension headaches, because girl, you are tense".

Then he said he wanted to try something to double-check his theory, but that it would be "Fuck my life painful" for a few minutes on each side. But I trust him, so sure. Then he stuck his thumb into my mouth on one side, gripped the outside of my jaw, and applied what felt like an appalling amount of pressure. The pain rivaled the migraine that sent me to the ER, and then lessened after a few minutes. Then he did the same thing to the other side.

After he did this torture, my migraine went away. No, you don't understand. I have had some level of migraine pain every day for MONTHS. (Yes, I mostly just ignore it, because what other option was there that wasn't medication that left me a zombie?)

It turns out he has the same sort of issues, and after a lot of research, found the treatment that works for him, which is a fuckton of Botox injections in those three muscle groups. Guess what I'm doing on Thursday afternoon?

I won't lie: I'm kind of freaked out by this. Buuuuuuut, if this is able to drop the migraines, it's worth it.

My migraine returned last night, with symptoms I had never, EVER experienced, and bad enough that I finally decided I should go to the ER.

It turns out I had a severe atypical migraine, with all sorts of symptoms that I never experienced, but aren’t out of the range of migraines.

The nice doctor gave me an IV of fluids and a mix of pain relievers, anti-nausea meds, and Benadryl, then sent me home to sleep. Which I did, for over 12 hours. I’m still groggy, but feeling MUCH better.

Last week, The Husband was gone, off doing the Artist Thing at a M:tG event in Vegas. This means that even tho' my usual bedtime routine involves sleep meds, my sleep was not ... how should I put this? Restful. Constant waking up to various degrees.

Then, to add another layer of sleep deprivation: Today was the start of three days of early morning planning meetings for work. I'm in favor of planning meetings! I totally support having them! But almost my entire team is located in Ottawa, which means East Coast time zone. Today's meetings started at 6am my time, and went through (with breaks) to 1pm. Wednesday's round of meetings start at 7am, and then back to 6am start for Thursday. This sort of schedule, combined with my delayed sleep phase disorder, means that I'm going to feel off-kilter jetlagged to hell without any travel for all of this week.

Aaaaaaaand, on top of all this: I had an awful migraine all day yesterday. On top of the off-and-on migraine I'd had for a week. I finally agreed with The Husband that maybe my neck was out? And yeah, I probably should make an appointment with the chiropractor? So I went in this afternoon, and my chiro cheerfully informed me that not only was my neck out in the usual spot (right at the base of my skull), but that my lower back was out on the right side, and oh hey, I had a rib out of place on each side, in different spots.

SELF, THIS IS NOT AN AREA WE NEED TO BE AN OVERACHIEVER.

After lots of clicks and crunches, hey presto! The migraine immediately lessened. The chiro also told me that according to my chart I come in every two months or so, which means that my idle thought that I should get some sort of x-rays or other imaging done to see if there's something going on with my neck needs to be not so idle anymore.

I am now visiting the land of Migraine Hangover, which is much better than the ... 3? 4? days I spent in MigraineLand. I woke up this morning, realized that why yes, something in my neck was out, this wasn't just a reaction to the ridiculously changeable weather we've been having. So I went to the chiropractor. A bunch of hideous grinding and crunching noises later, my pain levels have dropped substantially.

My chiro has no idea why my neck/atlas keeps going out of alignment, but has suggested that I look into Indian Club exercises to improve the strength in my arms, shoulders, and neck. Okay? He loaned me some starter clubs, and I'm going to watch some tutorials on ye olde internets. Apparently it's ... swinging clubs around. Sure! Let me learn to wave sticks around in a possibly menacing way!

(I asked him if I could just use parasols instead of the clubs. He sighed and told me no.)

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The new(ish, I've been doing it for a little over a month) low carb eating regime is actually helping with the general inflammation and pain issues I've been having. It also has been helping with brain fog. On the one hand, I miss mac&cheese SO MUCH. On the other hand, having a much lower level of background pain on a daily basis is AMAZING. And, I won't lie, this is also leading to weight loss, which means that the Body Image Demons are being quieter, which is really, REALLY nice. That's not the reason I'm doing this, but it's a nice side effect.

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Sometime this weekend, I really need to write a To Do list for everything I need to get done before Bats Day and Vampire Ball. But hey! The stress levels from work are dropping, which is something I kinda despaired of ever happening. Even the looming presence of multiple 6am planning meetings next week isn't making me want to run away and hide! I mean, I'm not thrilled about 6am meetings, but this time it won't be just me reminding everyone about documentation.

Last night I was woken up out of a soundly medicated sleep by one of the worst migraines I've ever had. My skull felt like it was trying to shift and expand, and I got to have that always fun debate of "What will be worse? The nausea, or actually throwing up?" A combination of meds, an ice pack at the base of my skull, and a heated buckwheat pillow on my face finally allowed me to get back to sleep.

I still have a migraine right now, but it's nowhere near as bad as it was last night. And this is where I thank all the spirits and powers that be that I have a job that (a) is work-from-home, and (b) doesn't care if I split my work time over different hours. Because in a few hours, I am heading to the spa, soaking, and then delivering myself into the merciful hands of my regular massage therapist.

---

Thank you for the kind words about Ruthven. He will be missed. Vlad is already roaming the house, looking for him.

I metaphorically swooned around 3pm, told work I was out with a migraine, and headed to the spa by my house. I hate summer temperatures (I hate the Burning Orb more), but melting in the steam sauna or soaking in a hot pool, followed by soaking in the tepid pool is the most reliable way of getting rid of migraines for me.

(Well, and occasionally submerging myself in the 56 degree cold plunge pool. I hate it, but the shock to my system flushes the migraine out really damn effectively.)

Now to avoid the heat for the rest of the weekend! Wish me luck.

In theory, I like Spring. But pollen and schizophrenic weather means that I'm dealing with some level of a sinus headache almost constantly. And y'know what? I've got a high pain tolerance (which, yes, has occasionally led to me ignoring things that I should have talked to a doctor about, because it's just pain, and I don't want to raise a fuss, and yeah. I know, I know, and I've been lectured about this many times.), so most of the time I just wince and ignore it. But the other night I had a sinus migraine come on so fast that I thought I was going to throw up while on the bus home, and when I DID get home, I flung myself on the couch and clutched an ice pack over the upper right side of my face. Remind me again why trepanation is such a bad idea?

And there are other things going on leading to stress. Nothing for folks to be worried about, just the usual accumulation of Too Much To Do and not enough time or energy. What all of this means is that I am trying to improve my mood by wearing things that I KNOW I love. Such as today's outfit:

Mmm, red velvet. And wacky hair volumizing powder which does indeed give my baby-fine, fly-away hair some gentle lift without needing backcombing or hairspray. I think this is my new favorite hair product.

Oh! LilyElspeth/Lorax of Sex custom-dyed a pair of my vintage Fluevogs. Originally they were black and cream, but now they're black and matches-my-lipstick burgundy:


Tonight, I need to get some writing done and try to go to bed early. Ahahahahaha. Yeah, we'll see if either of those happen.