When real things happen to imaginary people

Because the scientific community knows that black holes can be created at any mass. Send two particles colliding into each other with enough energy to get them to critical density and you could end up with a mini black hole. However, they'd only suck in items that actually touched their event horizon which would be incredibly small, much smaller than the nucleus of an atom. Meaning, it would probably just pass through most matter without anything happening. If it wasn't at escape velocity though, it would begin to orbit or oscillate around the Earth's center of gravity and eventually gather more mass as it does hit things over time. However, at the sizes we are working with Hawking radiation would probably cause it to bleed off energy (and therefore mass) and evaporate much faster than it could gather mass.

What we really need to worry about are stranglets that would turn everything around them into more stranglets.