Better news, but still not great

[cupcake_goth]

Firstly, it was Dad’s hemoglobin that was at 7, not his hematocrit. That’s … less alarming. It’s still not great, because that was under half of what it should be, but thanks to 3 units of whole blood, he’s around 11. He’s also got a heart monitor in case of tachycardia, and a big “SERIOUS FALL RISK” sign on his door. As you can imagine, all of this alarms me.

The colorectal and GI doctors are discussing tomorrow what to decide what to do (“Decide your fate” is what the Eastern European-sounding doctor said). The slow option is the one the last round of doctors went with, which was get him stable, send him home, and have his GI doctor do some sort of weekly injections to shrink and close the hemorrhoids. (I have no idea how that actually works.) The faster option is surgery, which, according to Dad relaying what he was told, is bloody and has a slow recovery. Personally, I want them to go for the surgery and get this taken care of, because the slow option isn’t working fast enough.

Oh, and did I mention he’s been on blood thinners for awhile? For good reasons, but they certainly aren’t helping with the current situation.

The lead nurse AND the chaplain* told Dad he had to talk to me about his wishes around heroic measures and DNR orders. ”Just in case”. None of his wishes were a surprise to me (we’d kinda talked about them the last time he was in the hospital), but now it’s all official and I have official power of attorney.

So hi, I’m nigh incoherent with stress. And repressing it like whoa, because I need to keep Dad’s spirits up. I’m staying at my step-sister’s for the next few days, because her place is a 5 minute ride to the hospital.

*Dad isn’t religious. He is at a Catholic hospital, so the chaplain wandered by. Dad told him that he wasn’t interested in G-D talk, but he was welcome to hang out. Apparently they spent a few hours swapping dirty jokes and tales of Catholic school.

Comments

[staxxy]

Do you need me? Should i come?

We have a chiro appt in the late afternoon but could prolly come up after.

I am relieved it is that little much not as bad, at least, and i agree he should go the surgery route, although blood thinners+surgery is not a great combo. I suspect the blood thinners are partially responsible for the low hemoglobin though.herm

[danabren]

Argh.

It's sweet that Dad and the chaplain got to have some good time together.

[musyc]

I would vote for slow recovery over slow healing. :\ Continuing good thoughts!

[noxcat]

Don't neglect yourself. Pillows are good for screaming into. Or punching. :)

[gwyn]

I am so sorry you and your dad are going through this. I'm familiar with it and it's not something I would wish on anyone; it's so freaking hard to deal with parents in poor health and also cope with your own life. As stressed as you are, you are doing incredibly well with all of it. Wishing all the best for you both.

[archersangel]

None of his wishes were a surprise to me (we’d kinda talked about them the last time he was in the hospital), but now it’s all official and I have official power of attorney.

that's good that is all official on paper & stuff.

[sistawendy]

Very much this, and I hope the papers cover the case where his mind is in worse shape than his body.

[garpu]

Was the chaplain a Dominican priest by the name of Fr. Thomas? :D He sounds exactly like him, if not...

[oldhalloween]

Happy you know his wishes and have POA set up. Give yourself time to decompress whenever you can. Sending healing energy.

[solstice_lilac]

This is a lot. I'm very glad you have a place to stay that's close to the hospital, and that you have the legal part in place--"just in case"--I found it kind of reassuring to have POA, myself, when my mom was in the hospital a couple of years ago, even though I certainly did not want to ever need to use it.

I hope your dad is comfortable there, as much as possible. Telling jokes and school stories with the chaplain sounds like a good sign that he's feeling like himself!

Thank you for staying in touch. Please remember to take care of yourself too.

[m_cobweb]

Thank you for keeping us posted. POA is useful for many things and they're not all scary, so it's good that that's all in order.